“Giving our elders our best rather than what’s left,” is a principle that our founding fathers modeled for us as they fought for the rights and liberties of our country.  Our founding fathers didn’t consider what was most convenient (for them), nor were they guided by factors that involved (the least amount of) time. In most cases, they gave their all… many times, under gruelling circumstances; in some cases, they gave the ultimate – never looking back… never wanting anything less than what was best for the common good. 

Our Constitution tells us that our founding fathers believed each person had the right to be treated with dignity and respect. All too often we see and hear of sub-standard care or lack of care that is given to our elderly. Do we advocate for them? Do we fight for their cause? Or, are we simply too busy to care?

Perhaps, as a nation, we must begin to consider caregiving as a family value, a way of life, and/or new standard for our life. Caregiving is not an easy thing to do. Caregiving takes time; caregiving takes patience. Caregiving takes a willingness to be stretched... to experience life outside our comfort zone. Most of the time caregiving will ask us to consider going the extra mile.

Generally, caregivers say that caregiving is a humbling experience. Some of us don’t want to be humbled; some of us don’t want to change.  In most cases, caregiving requires time that some of us don’t want to carve out of our busy day. One thing that is certain, a decision to do caregiving in the family home requires sheer determination: determination to do what is right in spite of what everyone else is saying and doing.

Our founding fathers showed us the power of the individual. It may be our turn now, to stand in the gap, to hold up a falling (economic) nation, and, to hold up our elder and/or disabled family member to provide the care that they require. Taking on the task of caregiving in the family home may not be what you thought you would be doing at this juncture in your life. Perhaps, you never thought of it as the right thing to do. It might come with criticism from those around you. To make a decision to do caregiving in the family home may require a strength from you that you never knew you had.

Hard work and sacrifice, putting others first… these are attitudes and values that shaped our country. Our founding fathers selflessly gave their lives, risking everything, never looking back…never asking why (me)? Our founding fathers showed us the power of the individual; they stood in the gap (for us). They believed (in us) and wanted a future (for us). "They raised their banner high”… they forged ahead.

Now, it seems, it may be our turn to give back (to our founding fathers).  Allow “honoring your parents” (and family members) to be your guide. Are you determined to do what is right? Are you willing to stand in the gap? Are you willing to give unconditionally? Are you willing to stay strong under the criticism of others? As you decide whether to do caregiving in your family home, let your heart lead you as you begin to make this very important and loving, family decision.